A Step In The Right Direction

YES!!!!!!!

So, I finally submitted my proposal to my professor this morning…

After all my yarns about finishing it on time and all that shit, I still wasn't done with it by yesterday morning. Imagine the shock and horror I felt when I walked into class yesterday morning, and I saw my professor standing right there… the man had been outta town for two weeks, cos his elder brother died. So he ran out. That was what had been saving me cos I know that if he'd been around, I'd have gotten a good tongue lashing or two for not having it ready.

And the truth is that I'd have deserved it. I spent the entire weekend in Gidi, getting up to some good old nefarious activities, and pursuing carefree hedonism (all that is simply big English to say that I spent the entire weekend catching trips) and my back has the scars to prove it.

Anyways, so I show up to class, and he's there. So at the end of the class I mumble some story about not knowing that he'd be around, and I'd have it printed and on his desk by 11am the next morning.

Needless to say, I was gonna be awake quite late trying to finish up. So, I worked late, mixed up with late night, long chats with one cute lil' thing that I've been chatting with recently (quite a charming girl…pity I'm not accepting relationship applications for now), and I finished my proposal sometime around 3am…

I turned it in, half expecting him to send me back. But then, he starts reading, and he's nodding, making a few adjustments here and there, and then he goes "this is very good. You can move on to chapter 1."

HA!!!!!

So, after a quite interesting weekend, and this….I'm as happy as a puppy with two tails….

Big ups to Shawty, Khems and Le Beau for being so encouraging…I totally appreciate it…

Anyways…I just felt like cranking out a lil something…I have a couple of things I'm trying to write about. One's called "Female Mythology". It's about Nigerian women and the misconception they have about Nigerian men…the other…I don't know what it's called yet. I don't even know if it's prose or poetry…all I know is that it's quite angry, and it's about Nigeria… I might even write about the scare I got this weekend…

Gotta go now…I've got a class…

Peace, love and soul.

Taking a Break from Work

*DeepBreath*

YES! I know I have work to do, and this is quite an odd hour to be talking about music, but I'm too tired to do anything else, so I may as well be a bit constructive…abi???

So I've been listening to music. Yep…quite a few Nigerian artistes have caught my eye recently… Kas, Ms. Con.tra.Diction (I hope I spelt that right), Show Dem Camp, Airis….and quite a few other people. But, I'm gonna talk about Airis, Show Dem Camp, & Con.tra.Diction. Cos they've really impressed me recently.


Ladies first, so lemme start with Airis.

First off, lemme state that Airis is a very hot, half Nigerian, half Egyptian woman, so my judgment may be thrown off a bit by that fact that she's so hot, but I doubt it. When I first heard about her, I thought she was gonna be another good looking woman who imagined that her fine face would make everyone partially deaf so we wouldn't realize that her voice was a waste of time (especially with the way her debut single "Without You" kicked off).

Was I ever wrong.

She has a voice that reminds me of a person that spent a lot of time listening to Sade Adu, Madonna, and other legendary pop divas, but somehow or the other found time to listen to Yoruba songs when she was younger; producing this really sexily blended voice that is obviously international, but still manages to be Nigerian. Kinda like a girl who you can take to a big dinner with international guests and all, and then the next day you take her to see your grandma in your village, and she blends into both situations very well. Kinda like that.

Her debut single, "Without You" is really cool. Her voice comes off really well over the instrumental, accentuated quite well by the tambourines and drums. The tambourines gave the song a little Arabian/Egyptian feel to it, which is just as well since she's half Egyptian anyways. A part of the chorus is in Yoruba, which just made me fall in love with her singing even more. I also heard another of her songs called "Sick in Love" featuring Ice Prince, and "Fly Away" which I liked as well, but in all honesty, not as much as I like Without You… I hear her album "The AiRis Project" is scheduled for release in November. That isn't too far off, so I won't die waiting.


Onto some people that are a little more recent in terms of emergence, let's talk about Show Dem Camp (SDC).

Now, the first song I heard from these guys, was this crazy song featuring Lynxx called "You Dey Crase". I heard that, & I thought to myself "we may have something good here"…really cool, mixtape kinda jam. Punchlines flying left & right…& Lynxx killed his verse. I was happy. Then I heard "Farabale". Lemme be honest, I didn't really dig the first dude's rap, but I LOVE THE SONG!!!! I really don't know how to analyze it…the chorus reflected the way a lot of naija boys feel about chics who are just gold-diggers, and MayD has quite a good voice. I really think these guys are definitely gonna go places.

By the way, the tees they're wearing in this picture are from my cousin Tenne Fatona's clothing line DNA Genes, so big ups to him! Whoop whoop!!! (I digressed abi???)

If you haven't heard "Farabale" by Show Dem Camp feat MayD, here's a link for it. http://www.4shared.com/audio/nO3AWXyw/Farabale_-_SDC_ft_MayD.html


Let's go with Con.tra.Diction now…

First off, I've met her quite a few times, with those crazy ass socks she always wears, & I have to say, she's a darling psycho. I heard her song "Superstar", & my faith in the hope for alternative music in Nigeria was renewed. The instruments were on point, and her voice gives off that rock chic thing that rock lovers (such as me) really like. Throwing in a bit of Yoruba into the song (Oju l'oro wa) was a fantastic way of making sure we didn't forget that it was a Nigerian tune. All in all, a fabulous song! Con.tra.Diction seems like someone we're gonna be hearing quite a lot from in the future… In the intro to the song, if you listen to the voice in the background, you can hear her say "this is the diary, of a mad black woman." I hope that's gonna be the title of the album…seems quite befitting…

I hear she even has a band!!! That's just really cool. If I ever decided to sing publicly (yes, your Panda has a good voice) I'd definitely love to jam up with her…

Of course, here's a link for Con.tra.Diction's "Superstar" if you don't already have it… http://www.4shared.com/audio/YNlqY89g/SuperStar_CONtradiction.html



So, these are the artistes I'm loving right now…hope their albums are as banging as the singles they have out… Fingers crossed!

Gotta go now! I'm a bit swamped with work so…. I'll blog later okay???

BYE!!!

A Wack Weekend

Reader, hope you're having a good weekend so far...I'm not.

Wow...

I'm...swamped with work. So much work that I don't even understand where I'm supposed to start. I've been scared to even write about it cos...I don't know...maybe writing is one of the things that matters the most to me. And so writing about it would only make this problem even more real...so I've been putting it off. Trying to work on poetry/spoken word...but the blocks in my head don't seem willing to go down, or to let me jump over them to write any thing worthy of being called poetry....-although, I started writing something that I really like, and I have ideas for it...but I just seem to be stuck somewhere.- So lemme write what my brain will allow me to...

It's been a crazy semester so far...being in final year is so much more work than I imagined that it would be. I just finished the first  page of my proposal for my final project, so you can see that I've gotten basically nowhere on it. But I know that it has to be ready to mail to my supervisor before Monday...only God knows how I'm going to do that, all I know is that I will. I've got assignments left, right & hitting me on the head...I've barely even started studying... I was supposed to have a test on Thursday. Thankfully it was cancelled cos of some seminar thingy my department was organising. I have no idea if I'd have been able to do well on it. & when I don't do well on a test, it throws a lot of pressure on me for the exam cos I know I'll have to really put my back into it to knock out an A...I really hate putting pressure on myself.  So...I'm glad the test was cancelled sha. At least I know a little bit more on the course than I did last week, & when I start preparing for it, the concept of projects, programs, plans, project cycles, & all that other horse shit won't seem so foreign to me.

Damn.

But...I know it'll be aight. I'll manage. I always do. No matter  how much bitching I may be doing right now, no matter how difficult things may seem, I always find a way to make it above the line. Whether it's 70 or 89, I've learned that an A is an A. So all I need to do is shoot for it.

Sometimes I wonder to myself when academic excellence started to matter so much to me...cos...I failed my way through secondary school...like I was a total failure. My old man threatened me when I was about to write WAEC, that if I failed, he was gonna carry me to some vulcanizer or tailor or something so I could start learning a trade or something...lol...those were scary times. I think, the day things started to fall into perspective for me, was the day Le Beau spoke to me. He told me that he understood me. Probably better than anyone else did. And he knew that all I had to do, was to really want something, & then work towards getting it. & nothing could hold me back. I believed him...I didn't fail WAEC...& when I got into Uni, I put the same theory into practice...the rest is history. That's why, I know I can do what I want. As long as I really wanna do it, I can.

So I'll be fine.

I'm actually happy I wrote this blog. It's sorta like a pep talk for myself....lol.

Anyways....there's work to be done. Last weekend was just trips...parties, drinks, home-made water bongs, chics...I had, the craziest margaritta ever...damn! That drink packed one heck of a punch!

But this weekend is gonna be serious...and so is my week.

Next weekend though....!

Better be a good one... Sundays At The Bay! : "Bikini's & Water Guns." I'll definitely be there...

But for now, back to work..

Posted via Blogaway on my Android Device.

Been a minute.

It's been quite a bit since I put  up  a blog about anything sensible....I still don't  have much to say right now. I just thought I should at least write something to remind y'all of my chubby  existence.

One reason I haven't been writing much, is  that I'm trying to work on spoken word. Yes, this Panda is trying to delve into poetry. I've been really inspired by poets  like Black Ice, Shihan, J.Ivy, Rives, Sage Hasson...you can find them all on YouTube.

So, I've been  trying my hands out at that...it's somewhat difficult, but I'll get the hang of it. Right now, I've got this very........"ashewo"ish poem I'm writing...inspired by recent activities &...that's besides the point...anyways, I've got this  really long piece I'm writing...hope I'll be able to memorise it.

School's really stressful...that's all the bitching I'll be doing about it. Cos if I go on, I may not be able to stop. But I know I'll get through it...don't have a  choice

Wow...I'm falling asleep. I'll put up something sensible soon...I promise. In fact, I'm gonna put up a post on 3 artistes I'm feeling at the moment! Can't wait to finish it.

Okay bye!!!!

October 13.

Today, as we spoke over the phone, I could almost see you staring at me with those big brown eyes that I always felt I could dive into without even having to try.

You promised you would try. You said today was the last time you'd do anything to bring a tear to this grown man's eye.

Today as we spoke, I could hear the sound of your voice so sincere. You promised me you'd always be there

The way you felt was deeper than simply saying that you cared.

You loved me as big as the sky; you loved me to the moon.

Today was a year ago. You left me two months before the end of June.

But this poem isn't meant to point fingers, or say you broke my heart.

This poem is an ode to a relationship we thought would never fall apart.

This poem is a testament to the fact that we couldn't test what wasn't meant to be.

You see, when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object, it's bound to end in catastrophe.

We may have been an unlikely pair, but we loved each other, you and I.

You loved my big belly; I loved your nappy hair.

I loved the taste of your lips, like the taste of sugar sprinkled all over a juicy pear.

Together we were always meant to be, and the idea of you without me was something we couldn't bear to see, let alone handle.

Our love was impossible to hide, like putting under a bed a lit candle.

We were meant to be forever, but forever moved faster than we expected. Fast forwarding us to a point where we could love no more,

And the hope for a future had been turned to us glancing at the past, reminiscing on those days…

Forever fast forwarded us……into today.

The Morning's Musings.

6:45AM

Facing yourself with the truth is never an easy task. Admitting to yourself that you've omitted something, or gone astray in a particular way, can be the  most difficult thing that any man can be asked.

It's so much easier to just sit & stew in feigned ignorance of your wrong doing than to come to terms with it.

Coming to terms means facing the  consequences of what you've done, and admitting to yourself "Yes. This was my fault."

These consequences could be anything. Seeing a former lover in tears, & knowing that her heart is in pieces because of you. Or looking at your CGPA in your final year & realizing, that you'd played away 4 years of your life, & quite a large sum of money. It may even be attempting a workout in Capoeira,& realizing that can't even make it halfway because you've gotten very horribly outta shape... realization could come to you in any number of ways.

But a lot of the time, we choose not to take the high road of admitting the truth. Black Ice said "ignorance is bliss & niggas love this, so they take pride in not knowing."

But the truth is, the truth of your ways will come to you sooner or later. If it doesn't come to you when you're looking in her eyes & seeing the pain you've caused, it'll come to you when you've left a string of shattered souls in your wake, & the curses of these scorned women catch up with you, & you find yourself all alone. It'll catch up with you when you have to show the skill you're supposed to have acquired as a caporista, & you can't, because you're so outta shape, you can barely even do the most elementary of drills.

Whatever it is that we run from, will catch up with us someday. No matter how fast we may try to go.

I decided, a few months ago, to stop running. From everything. Now, I live. I wait. For whatever it is, to come meet me. Some people may look at me & think I'm running from God, but the truth is, I'm tired of this song & dance. Now I watch... will He remember me?? I simply wait.

In other ways, I'll do what I can to manage the concequences of sitting back & watching my stomach evolve into a fluffy ball, & the strength I possessed, fade away... Time to start some workout routine or something...

Face the truth, grow a pair. Set yourself free.

The Need For Knowledge

So, it's the 18^th of September, 2010. This is officially the last weekend I'm supposed to spend in Lagos until Uni closes for Christmas in December. Of course you & I know that is completely impossible, & I'll be back in Lagos as soon as something of interest calls out to me. But that sort of information doesn't really need to be available to everybody now does it.

And it's funny I should say that, because the idea of me concealing information, brings to mind a blog post by Le Beau, where he talked about the strength of information being in the measure & fidelity of it. That actually makes quite a bit of sense. And in truth, information is concealed by different people from people, for a whole mixed up set of reasons. And I'm in no position to judge anyone, because here I am, not telling my dad that from time to time, I may just leave school and come into Gidi to hang out with my boys, or to liaise with some cute girl or the other, or for whatever reason.

So why do people hold back information from each other? To maintain some form of peace of mind? Because of course there's always that old saying "what you don't know won't hurt you." How many of us actually believe that? And what gives any human being the right to decide how much we should know? Human judgment is, most times, quite deficient. And so the choice to keep knowledge from a person may just be an act of unkindness. Example?? Back in the medieval age, the commoners didn't know how to read. They had to live their lives from day to day without the information that would have been able to set them free from bondage, and create a more egalitarian society. At that time, the nobility claimed that it was for "their own good", but of course, we know now that it was simply a way to maintain control over the masses. Ignorance is in truth an open prison.

That being said, if ignorance is an open prison, and the truth supposedly sets you free, then that should mean that everyone is in some form of prison or the other, because at every given point in time, someone, somewhere, is keeping some information from you. For whatever reason it may be.

My dad & I had a bit of an argument yesterday. I told him, that since I got home 3 months ago, if it's not one thing, it's another. He says to me that I should go and check myself then, to "reflect & find" what I'm doing wrong. I asked him, why he doesn't simply tell me what it is I'm doing wrong, & I can sort myself out faster that way. But for reasons best known to him, he decides to leave me in the dark, in this prison of ignorance where I keep messing up & he keeps getting pissed off…

Personally, I wanna know as much as possible. I wanna learn all there is to learn. I wanna know what the real is. Knowledge and experiences are what differentiate me from the next person. So, like Colin Firth said in Dorian Gray, sometimes, it's just about the next experience…the next sensation. The next thing that I didn't know. Thanks to an ex girlfriend, I've developed an even more over active desire for knowing the truth. Even when I know that it may not necessarily do me the least bit of good. But well…it's just one of those things…