The Morning’s Musings

6:22 am.

Fantastic. I woke up this morning at precisely 6 am, thanks to the alarm on my phone blasting out Sean Paul's "Breakout". Believe me, the sound of that Jamaican dude's voice is enough to wake anyone up. I take in a waking breath, thinking I'm gonna twist and turn (yes, yes, I'm not going running, so sue me), and go back to sleep…GOOD GOD!!! What is that smell??? It's the smell of concentrated ammonia (otherwise related to urine) thanks to this no water issue…

I don't really wanna start this blog by complaining but in all honesty and actuality, people… I am fed.

We've had a case of water scarcity in this my "great, esteemed, and private" university since last week Thursday. Isn't it time that the bloody pipelines were fixed??

I will not get upset, I will not get upset, I will not get upset… **taking a deep breath**

Anyways, so it's a new dawn, it's a new day, all that stuff. Yesterday was my best friend's (Onochie Ifedebe) birthday. Happy belated to his silly ass… and if you were wondering why, if I said I was gonna make this a series, I didn't put up an update yesterday, it was 'cos in all honesty, I didn't know what to write…yes. I suffer from repeat incidents of writer's block quite a lot of the time. And if you haven't read my last update (came up Monday night), it's called "My Pen Forsakes Me". It's generally a lament about the problems of writer's block. Dedicated to all my friends that are writers themselves (Laide Olabode, Sista Soul, Tosyn B *& the rest of her*, Adebola Rayo…)

So this morning, I remember how fragile life can be. I've lost quite a number of really good friends over the last few years, and believe me, it's quite a painful experience. So, I'm grateful to God for sparing Laide's life last weekend. Some silly sod almost mowed her down… she's gonna be alright though… that her big head was just too big to be broken so easily (lol), get totally better soon babes.

Speaking about accidents and death, Dagrin was in a real bad accident last weekend, and as Nigerians are prone to do, the rumors were just flying all over town like witches flying at night. By Saturday evening (thanks to my friends on the BlackBerry Network) I was hearing that the dude was dead, and by Sunday morning, I heard the dude was in a coma. Na wa o… do people really have to spread rumors like this? I mean, has it become like a national pastime or something? I think Ice Prince said on twitter that he wishes death on the people spreading rumors about Dagrin's death. Even though I feel that was a little bit intense, it's just that these people self, their own don too much! If you don't have anything good to say, please keep quiet!!! I'm not particularly a Dagrin fan or anything, but he is a human being, and I think he lives (or used to live) in Magodo, so I wish the brother a speedy recovery…

Sundays @ The Bay comes up this weekend (woop woop!!!!), and if you've never been for one of 'em, this month would be a good month to show up. Especially cool is that the venue is changing this month. Usually, it's done either at Alpha Beach, or at Takwa Bay, but this month, it's gonna be at…. Where's it gonna be at again?? Oh yeah. It's gonna be at some boat club in Apapa. It's usually quite fun so, if you go for the early service in church on Sundays, and you can make it to our take off point at City Mall by 11am…please show up if you wanna. Just make sure you try to bring something to share with 4 other people (it's all about S. H. A. R. E you know) and leave your forming attitude in the car (it won't be needed where we're going)

Anyways, I have to go iron what I'm gonna wear to school this morning o… the life I'm living…

See y'all later.

B. E. Z.

My Pen Forsakes Me.

My pen forsakes me sometimes.

When I try to reach into the inner recesses of my mind.

The deepest sanctums of my soul.

I try to give expressions to the things that ail me,

The problems I see, but can't actually speak out loud, what they are.

It's not always problems though;

Sometimes it's a plethora of pleasure.

A grand collection of things that make me happy.

They lighten my feet like a deer on steroids.

And sometimes, it's about desires that could drive a normal being wild.

Inner needs which I need to feed upon.

Flesh I wish to touch, to do things that… let's not go down that path…

And sometimes…it's the sadness.

Deep, resonating, sadness.

I think it goes past what they call chronic melancholy.

It's just pure, untouchable, unquestionable, sadness.

Even creativity. That as well goes untouched.

A song that'll never be sung,

A poem that'll never be read.

At this rate I wonder if my soul will ever be heard.

So with this great expanse of emotions that runs rampant in the fields of my inner being

Unseen by the entire world,

I walk to & fro, looking for a way out.

I find a pen and a pad…freedom at last…

But…

It's like trying to jump off a cliff, only to find you still on the ground.

'Cos my pen forsakes me sometimes.

When I need to bleed in order to survive

To yield to this fire that rages within.

But my pen forsakes me.

It will not heed my pleas

Please!!! I beg…

Allow my soul the release of transmogrification.

Let my words be read by people in different locations.

Let me write my spirit,

And empty the vessels of my soul.

Till the pages of this pad are a roaring ocean…

The very notion of a disobedient pen seems so absurd!!!

"Word"? My pen asks me.

And I'm left to watch as it forsakes me.

I'm left to stew in my own juices.

Attempting to seek solace in ways that just won't work.

I cannot speak with my mouth that which my hands wish to bring forth!!!

English people call it "Writer's Block"…

And you may be wondering, why my pen would allow me write about it in such a manner…

Believe me; I have no idea either…

All I know is, sometimes, at times when I wish it would behave…

Sometimes, my pen forsakes me.

The Morning’s Musings

6:14 am..
Ain’t this the weirdest time to be sitting and pounding away at a keyboard??? Yeah… but then you must admit, the award for being the most normal person was never gonna be given to me anyways…lol.
So…it’s past six in the morning, and a lot of random thoughts are running through my rather large cranium…
Why is this my roomie here??? Recently, just the mere sight of him has begun to irritate me… I mean, it’s not like he’s done anything to ME in particular, it’s just that some of his habits are just so irritating… he chews with his mouth open, leaves the entire room in a mess ALWAYS!!! His own idea of cleanliness is a well made bed, clean clothes, well polished shoes, and he’s good to go. H e NEVER tries to clean up the room. I remember when I moved back in at the beginning of the semester… damn!!! The bathroom looked like King Leonidas’ 300 men had all had their baths in their…and the nigga didn’t seem to think there was anything wrong with having his bath there… I was on my hands and knees (get your minds ouuta the gutters kids) scrubbing that place in like 5 minutes! And the buffoon had the nerve to then be telling me how he appreciated my coming back and doing stuff like that… “what the hell is wrong with you man”!!!! [ this is what I wanted to yell at him]. “Is this how you live at home???!!!” but I didn’t…. and you know, since that day, one of my other roomies [a more responsible kid who has home training] have cleaned that room so many times…this dude…zilch. And now, the kettle I should be using to boil water this morning, the BAKA (Japanese for idiot, fool, stupid person and a few other things) used it to cook noodles yesterday and didn’t wash it!!!
….people, I’m fed….
Anyways…before I make this all about my annoying roomie, he’s asking me if I wanna go running…and yes, I have been slacking off on the running I must admit… I mean, you guys should give this Panda a break!! I weigh roughly 100kg [give or take a few kg] so running 3500 meters every morning isn’t particularly easy for me. But on this fateful morning though, there’s no water in my hostel. There’s been no water in hostel since Friday. Something about an issue with the mains that needs fixing, so I’ve been fetching buckets of water from quite long distances… kai! N326,000 for school fees, and this is what we’ve been reduced to (check pictures that @lankydiru put on twitter)…so since I have to fetch water, I ain’t going running with him [yes, yes, excuses…bite me!]
Moving on…
She’s writing her last paper this morning… finally she’s free…good for me you know…we get to talk, I don’t have to bully her into reading and all of that…and I have a reason to come home from school this weekend…you know what I mean??
Speaking about me & her…lol…we’ve been getting a lot of silly people on twitter talking about how we’re a cute couple and all…you think we’re over doing it??? Ah well…that’s kinda your biz…lol…
And Twitter…yeah…Twitter’s become so much more interesting for me…a lot of my friends are on there…and there’s the Twiterave.
What’s the Twiterave about? I’m not quite sure yet, but from what I gather, Bold Ent is organizing this Twitter party…and there’s gonna be an awards show!!!! Highest number of tweets?? I think that goes to my girl @Miss_Ikaz easily… Perviest tweep… that’s my homie @ThePervNerd. Tweep with the best TT’s?? I’d give that to @PlaybackGenius [y’all remember the #WelcomeToNigeria trend?? He started that] Most popular Tweep… obviously @exschoolnerd…I don’t think celebrity tweeps can be nominated…that wouldn’t be fair…half the country already knows them…lol… #BeefTweet somebody? And I would nominate my girl @MissGIDI for good rookie, cos she’s not been on for what…two weeks??? And she’s already fully into the twitter rave!!!! Anyways, make sure [if you’re on twitter] you go vote at http://www.boldentertainment.net/twiterave.htm you can vote for me and her as best couple [yeah right]… by the way, if you’re not already following me, @CapoeiraPanda… I’ll try to follow you back once you lemme know k???
Anyways…have other stuff to do this morning…but I like this…maybe I’ll write again tomorrow morning. Who knows?? Till then… later kids!!!